According to Brendon Burchard, Unhappy People think Happiness is a mystery. They think that happiness is a big mysterious force that is difficult to figure out. How many times have you heard people say,” I just want to be happy.” Happiness in other words is contentment, joy, pleasure, cheerfulness, glee, enjoyment, well-being for a lot of people. He says, Happiness is one of the most studied areas of human endeavour in the history of the world. People struggle for no reason searching for happiness. Psychology and Philosophy have been talking about happiness for centuries. Common sense is not common practice that’s the reason people struggle.
Happiness come from an orientation towards the world where the past, present & future is looked into in specific ways.
Past could be looked into as gratitude, fond memories, good experiences but it could also be seen as challenges, turmoil, struggles, sufferings etc. But we feel a sense of acceptance and gratitude and we take it as it should be and feel that whatever happens should be accepted.
When we think about the present, we feel that we are happy with whatever we are doing consciously each day. We challenge ourselves a little bit in doing things that we are passionate and interested about. We try to develop awareness in what we are doing. People take help of spiritual texts, teachers and trainers to become just more present in the moment. The Power of “NOW” helps people to live in the present.
The Future helps in anticipating with excitement about what’s to come in the future. You know that there could be further hardships, turmoils and life could treat you badly it could be very scary. There will be all this for sure. But if you cannot find anything to be excited about tomorrow, it has nothing to do with the actual future. It is your mindset which has poisoned itself in pools of pessimism for so long that you have drowned yourself of hope. Even if you think that tomorrow you will feel better than you felt today, you are more optimistic and will look forward to the next day. You have to feel and be excited about that. Find something to be excited about for tomorrow. It could be anything at all like watching a movie you had been wanting to watch for some time and never found the time to do that. This is the emotional world and mental world of happiness. There is magic to life. Be in peace with the past, be present and engaged in the present and be excited and anticipate something for the future.
What do we need to be happy emotionally and physically healthy? You need…
8 hours of sleep
Drink more water
Take breaks throughout the day
Eat more greens
Stand up… don’t be hunched all day
Work out 3 to 4 times a week
Move around a little bit
Avoid the sugars and caffeine
Avoid white starch etc.
Don’t we know all this? Of course, we do. It is common sense that needs to be applied.
People are often unhappy in their relationships. People do not use the common sense normally applied to relationships since centuries ago. If you are unhappy, have you ever thought if you spend quality time with your loved ones, Are you appreciative and adoring them, Are you giving them the benefit of doubt? Are you realizing that it is you in a relationship with them and you are inter dependent? Are you making life fun for each other? Is there honour and respect for each other? If you think your marriage is going stale it is because of both losing the spark in your marriage. You have to learn to relight the fire. There should be a sense of connection to something larger to our self. None of this is magic. There should be a day when you must actually sit and analyse your life. When you think about this you will be able to design the life that you want to live and be happy. You will feel blessed that we can decide who we want to be tomorrow.